hmmm

long time......yes long time.....it doesnt mean tht nothng special.......everythng special.....happening....

sometimes.. no..most of the time I'm lazy .....

I came here in Jan 12 ...and on july 12.....I'm half an year old here in UK......yeah its been more than 190 days over here.....wat an experience.....mentally its tiring....its making the most out of u...squeezing..pushing...to an extent to live....

its been an entirely different living conditions compared to back home....
its all you ....and u are the only one who deciede which is ur way....and it must be feasible...and its hard...

when I tried to get an admission over here in UK .....basically it was a escape ...because I was depressed literaly.....

when i got the admission in Demontfort University , Leicester....I was bit relieved.....after getting the admission, on gettingg the offer letter....I informed my parents about my plan........They thought tht I was joking......
at tht point itself My mom literally shocked.....she never exected me to take a big decision lke this........to go for an overseas education....and my mom at the end gave me a half yes.....bt it was hard....
My father didnt sed anythng special as usual...so cool more than me...ha ha ha.....

after one week or somethng the result for the Airforce officer post published....and I got selected....I was amazed.....
now i have two option....big decision very small time to take tht step....

I was supposed to enrol on september 2008....and the SSB(selection) was on september-october...
The airforce officer post was very good......at the end I dropped the UK programme....
starte dpreparing fr the SSB....physically I was fine to get through....and I got a book to prepare fr the selection..i started well.....contacting different people from IAF tht I know.......
I gained confidence...tht I can get throgh....

I got the letter to report....and they have given the requirements.....and I noted about the age criteria.....and I missed tht for 2 mnths....
SO I called them. and talked them about my issue.....the officer told me tht U can take a chance....bt the probablity of taking me in is very less...he frankly said tht to me....

fucked up......I lost completely....

I lost both the option.......the only way tht I can refresh myself is friends and gym....I started traing very hard....two times a day.........stilll I was worried much about me on tht time.....
I trained very very hard to beat tht pain...of loosing...and it made me much harder...and softer......and more patient....after sometimes I decided to go fr the higher education......

from tht point evrythng was so fast.....in tht process I drained out...everythng was done by me.....yeah..my mother and father helped....bt the processwas so rigourous to get the statements , bank loan, and stuffs.......

and got the visa stamped on 10 th of jan and I came here on 12 th...
this is my story,,,,,and the story goes on....continuing......
and will be continuing fr a while....

I knw I have always gave my mother tension and worries about me.....only to mother....not to my father.....He's not bothered about worrying me...thats wat I thnk.....bt not really..he also have worry about me..bt he didnt showed tht .....
I'm not gonna say tht my parents are the worlds best parents.....
bt I knw one thng.....more thn me caring about them..they care about me.....
thts true fr evry parents...

sometimes I miss my mom's dishes which is not good..becoz almost everytme she miss somethng important....and tht imperfections are remarkable.....and I remember them always.....


MJ ...signing off